Socks are only for bowling.
You never use an umbrella because the rain will be over in five minutes.
A good parking space has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade.
Your winter coat is made of denim.
You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites.
Anything under 70 degrees is chilly.
You’ve driven through Yeehaw Junction.
Every other house in your neighborhood had blue roofs in 2004-2005.
You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn’t worth waking up for.
You dread love bug season.
You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren’t Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley, Frances, Ivan, Jeanne, Wilma, Irene, Cheryl, Rita, Mary, Alison.
You know what a snowbird is and when they’ll leave.
You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.
“Down South” means Key West.
Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meetings.
You have a drawer full of bathing suits and one sweatshirt.
A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.
You’ve hosted a hurricane party.
You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Withlacoochee, Thonotosassa and Micanopy.
You understand why it’s better to have a friend with a boat than have a boat yourself.
You’ve lived your entire life without ever meeting someone who couldn’t swim.
You’ve worn shorts and used the A/C to bring in the New Year.